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So the ‘couple of days’ between articles has turned into a couple of weeks. We’ve been busy visiting friends in all corners of France in the mad rush leading up to our departure to Australia in… TWO WEEKS! How time does fly.

Where was I in the telling of my Kenyan tale? Oh, that’s right:

The Really Juicy Details

I couldn’t go to Kenya without going on a safari. The grandfather of our friend and willing guide, Lucki, used to work in a national park, and he passed on plenty of knowledge to his grandson. Lucki was able to take a mere glance at animal droppings then tell us the kind of animal it came from and how long it had been there. By looking at the state of trees and foliage, he could tell us if and approximately when elephants had last passed through. Lucki didn’t cease to amaze us with his knowledge, hence we dubbed him “Luckipedia”.

It’s a cliché but… It’s always been a dream of mine to go and see the animals in Africa. So, ever since we decided to make the trip (about a year ago), I’ve been really excited. Like reallyreallyreally excited.

I tried to curb my enthusiasm by telling myself that I’ve already seen most of these animals in zoos. How different can it be, right? An elephant is still an elephant.

But a poor elephant in a zoo is no wild elephant. A wild elephant got game, yo. He’s all like, “What are you lookin’ at? Do I need to come a chargin’ at you and your shitty excuse for a Jeep?”

Thankfully, the wild elephant in this instance decided we were harmless (or just too pathetic to be wasting his time on) and he trooped on, his herd following peaceably alongside him.

We visited several national parks. We had to stay in the car at all times, except in designated areas. Here’s a run-down of our experiences in each park:

Tsavo West National Park

This is a beautiful park. The roads are made up of red dirt until you hit the area where there was recent volcanic activity, so the soil is black. As for the skyline, it’s stunning: there are volcanic rock formations as far as the eye can see.

If you can, stay in the hotel located within the park. It’s the only way you can see what goes on down at the waterhole after dark, when the elephants and lions come out of hiding. We had a drink on the veranda in the middle of the day and managed to spy a herd of zebras enjoying a tipple. A giraffe watched cautiously from faraway, keeping a respectful distance. Apparently animals know how to take turns.

We also saw several dikdik couples (they’re monogamous and stay together for life), many guinea fowl, the nostrils and plump shadow of a shy hippo who stayed hidden underwater, a crocodile, numerous fish, lizards, gazelles, weaver birds, antelope, a huge family of baboons, vervet monkeys and a large herd of buffalo. The buffalo were resting in the shade, each one covered in red dust. Apparently rolling around in the dirt is one of their favourite pastimes. According to Luckipedia, they don’t ‘moo’. Wikipedia says they ‘honk’ and ‘croak’.

After Tsavo we wanted to head east to a small village called Oloitoktok, at the base of Mount Kilimanjaro. Lucki was told that the route we had to take is very dangerous as it’s frequented by poachers. So we asked around at the gate and were escorted by a soldier armed with a machine gun until safely into Maasai farming territory. The roads were in terrible condition and we had to drive very fast through them. Unfortunately it was at this moment, just when we couldn’t stop to take photos, that three magnificent giraffes chose to be close to the roadside. We didn’t see any others at such close proximity during the rest of our trip.

Amboseli National Park

If you like elephants, this is the park to visit. Visibility is great here, as there are hardly any trees obstructing the view. This is in part due to the savanna landscape and in part because the elephants enjoy regularly tearing out a tree or two (they got game!). We spotted warthogs, zebras, warthogs being chased from the water by zebras, many many wildebeests, hippos, gazelles, ostriches, secretary birds, red-crowned cranes and elephants galore.

The elephants were having a wonderful time bathing in close proximity to hippos – a rare sight, said Luckipedia. Normally the land is dry, but thanks to recent downpours, there were a lot of swampy areas for the animals to play in.

I think my favourite new animal find would have to be the wildebeest. They are funky looking dudes. They get a bad wrap. People think they’re stupid and have a lemming-like herd instinct, and ugly because of their strange buffalo/goat/horse/antelope-like appearance. But I find all that to be rather endearing.

Lake Bogoria National Park

I went here to see geysers – not the English kind, I saw enough of them in Paris as drunken tourists. Even though the water level had risen significantly due to heavy rainfall, which hid the hot springs from view, I couldn’t be disappointed as the lake was covered with a carpet of pink flamingoes. Thousands and thousands of the little suckers.

We were lucky to see them as they tend to move around to wherever the food is at. The fact that the water in Lake Bogoria must have been around 80°C didn’t seem to bother them. The overwhelming smell of boiled feathers and warm algae did bother me.

Like many tourists before us, we boiled our eggs in the hot springs and crouched in the shade of nearby trees to eat our simple picnic lunch, listening to the chirping of birds (one of whom kindly offloaded on my shoulder) and the mooing of the zebu grazing nearby. It was a magical afternoon.

NOT Masai Mara

We didn’t spot any big felines during our travels, and that’s probably because we didn’t visit Masai Mara – the most-visited of the national parks, and the place where you can easily spot a pride of lions, lounging in the shade after a big feed. We didn’t want to spend our entire trip animal-watching in the national parks – plus the entry fees are expensive. I’m okay with not having seen any big cats, as we saw plenty of other animal life. The lions will be there for next time.

Enough already

That’s enough with the words. But this story is not complete without the pictures:

I’d say I still have one more article in me about my trip to Kenya. Stay tuned!